Thursday, March 8, 2012
So, here I am in my skirt and tights (I couldn't get my shoes in the picture). I'm not sure what's up with the snarky looking smirk on my face. The seam is probably digging into the ball of my foot, or maybe the crotch of my tights is about to become visible at my knees. And look how I'm hanging on to my chair. That's because I have heels on and I'm probably about to topple over. I am one fine specimen of a woman, let me tell ya. I have the grace of an antelope (one that has 3 broken legs), the poise of a ballerina (who is stone drunk on scotch), and the fashion sense of the most famous designer ever (who is blind and crippled in both hands). Look at me. Bathe in the glory that I emit. Hope and pray that one day, you can be as awesome as me. And if you're lucky you won't be near me the next time I rip off my Pay Less shoes and adjust the damn seam on my hosiery.