Wednesday, December 3, 2014

Future Superstar

Ever since I was a young teen - and that was thousands of years ago, I've wanted to be a rock star. When I was in middle school, I imagined a name for my future band...Electric Blue.

I was going to be a sen-say-shun!!!!! It didn't matter that I couldn't play the guitar or drums. I was trained to play classical piano and I figured that I could wing it until I could play rock music for real. That, or I could play a mean cowbell or tambourine. I did not practice or join a garage band, I just figured a rock gig would fall into my lap and I'd be a sensation.

After I got older, I rode on the coattails of my brother who was in a small informal band. The lead musician of the group liked me and he let me get up on stage on occasion and sing backup. And let me tell ya, I was in heaven. I had found my niche. I did a fair job of singing harmony and could enjoy the glory without having to remember the lyrics of every song they played. I felt like a rock star even though the only places I got to sing at were mom and pop restaurants on the outskirts of the city and at lake parties where all of the visitors were drunk.

You can't see them, but there were lots of drunk people watching us.

At Mancuso's restaurant playing for about 20 people.

At Mancuso's again. Playing for about 15-20 people

Don't I look snazzy? I like the coat I'm wearing in the middle picture. It looks like the color gods threw up on me. And they were on acid at the time.

I have to admit that those times I got to sing backup were some of the best times I've ever had. I loved singing even if I wasn't the greatest. I felt special because I got to stand on the stage and shake my hips and watch the audience nod their heads to the beat. 

I've been known to jump up and join the musicians on open mike nights because the urge overtook me and I just could not sit still any longer. I figured if the evening was devoted to amateur musicians, I wouldn't get into too much trouble by joining in. 

I'm 51 freakin' years old and I still want to be a rock star!!! I still don't have any ability to play a musical instrument but I can harmonize. I don't even want to be the lead musician. Just give me a pair of leather stilettos and let me gel my hair up into spikes and I will be good to go. All I need is someone who wants a person older than in their 20s who is happy to turn their volume down and harmonize. That's all I need. Please. Someone. Anyone.

Tuesday, December 2, 2014

Anita's Gecko

A friend of mine is an empty nester and I think being alone is starting to affect her. She has a cat and 2 dogs and has recently adopted a gecko. This gecko has it made living with her. It's got a big fish tank with places to climb and hide, and a fancy schmancy rock that has magnetized sides so you can put one piece inside the tank and it has a spot for the lizard to hide, and the other half of the rock is on the outside so you can remove it and peek at the critter trying to hide in the rock. It gets fed live crickets and worms on a regular schedule and there's even a heat lamp to keep the habitat nice and warm. This lizard is living large!

When the gecko first came to live at the Palace D'Anita, she noticed that it's eyes were not open. It was a gecko with disabilities! She was given a defective pet - a bargain bin buddy.

The poor little guy had to feel his way around because his little eyes were sealed shut. If I were a gecko and my eyes were sealed shut and I had just landed a sweet gig at a posh lizard hotel, I'd be pissed! I'd want to see if I had a barcalounger or a disco light or if the drapes matched the carpet.

Luckily for that gecko, Miss Anita knew how to do ocular surgery and she worked for 2 whole weeks on those crusty eyes until one happy day, that critter could see. Apparently, a lizard sheds it's skin and that includes the covering of the eyes, only this little guy shed it's skin but not it's eye coverings and had been denied the opportunity to see the world through fresh eyes. Until Dr. Anita came along that is.

These days he's a happy critter. He can see the world around him and he even got a next door neighbor...another gecko. They have to be the same size to coexist or the larger gecko will kick the ass (or tail) of the smaller one, so it might be a little while before they can share a home. Maybe during that time they can work out who will empty the trash and who will do all of the dusting so that they won't bicker once they move in together. A homey gecko is a happy gecko - or so I've been told.