Thursday, May 10, 2012

Baby's skeeeeered!

Little baby came to me last night with the admission that she was scared to start college. You could have knocked me over with a feather. I might have seen this kidlet scared maybe 10 times in her 18 years of life. She’s a teeny 5’1, 96 lbs. soaking wet little firecracker. She doesn’t take any shit from anyone and will get right up in someone’s face if they’re giving her grief. So, to see her scared about something really rattled me.
This is the girl who went off to dance camp, had her appendix rupture (unknowingly), called home to tell me she was thinking about throwing in the towel and then decided to stick it out for 2 more days. And performed with a fever of 102 and pus bubbling in her belly! This is the girl who was hospitalized for 7 days afterwards with all kinds of monitors and tubes hooked up to her and she didn’t show one hint of fear.
This is the girl who can get up in front of hundreds of people and dance her little fanny off and not give it a second thought. (I’d be worried about tripping over my big toe and falling and making a fool of myself.) She was a cheerleader for years so she did all kinds of stuff in front of crowds.
This is the girl who had the offer to be taught how to shoot a rifle (that was bigger than her) so she picked it up, aimed and fired without hesitation. It took me about 10 tries before I’d pull the trigger!
I was a C and D student all through high school people, and I went to college hours from home. I lasted two whole semesters before I bombed out and had to return home. I was scared all the time, homesick, without direction, a drunkard…a failure. The entire school experience was a hard row to hoe for me until I went back to school in my 30s.
My baby girl? She’s been a good, hardworking student and has pulled A’s and B’s and made it look easy. This little girl will ace college! And yet, she’s scared that she won’t. Mr. Man and I tried telling her that we sincerely believed that college was easier than high school. In high school, students have to take anywhere from 4-7 classes in one day! And do work for each class! In college, classes are spread out. Yes, there’s homework and stuff but I don’t think it’s as intense. Unless you’re going to medical school or you’re taking 35 hours at once or some such thing. My baby is just starting out. I want her to ease into college classes, maybe take 3 classes and work part time. You know, get her feet wet before jumping into the deep end. The last thing I want her to do is feel like she has to move off to Tim-buk-tu and take 90 hours and become a brain surgeon in 2 years. I tried that and it didn’t work.
I don’t know if I made her feel any better. I sure hope I did. All I could do is stress to her that she was welcome to continue living with me while she went to school, and that I believed in her just as much as I believed that the sun would come up in the morning. I offered to carry her lunch box and hold her hand on the first day of classes and wait outside of her class room to make sure she was OK. I’ll beat up any bullies and attend every parent teacher conference, I’ll brush her hair and remind her to floss, I’ll put love notes in her lunch sack and continue trying to embarrass her in front of her friends and I’ll do that until she’s 47 if need be. Because I know she’ll be absolutely fine and will be a stellar student and after the first few weeks won’t need me any more.

Dig the early 90s frosted hair and those glasses!!! Those are just wrong!!

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