I come from a family of kooks. My dad used to call my friends by the wrong name just to watch them squirm. Instead of calling me by my name, he used two favorite nicknames; Francine (who knows where that came from) and Poodlebeth.
All of my family members use words incorrectly. On purpose. Just like that...rather than saying on purpose, we'd all say on porpoise. Hamburgers are referred to as hamburglers. In my family, we don't put fuel in our cars. We use fruel. You get the idea.
I have an aunt who is always getting phrases mixed up (not on purpose). Here are a few just to entertain you.
Instead of saying that she was madder than a wet hen, she'd say she was madder than a wolf.
If something was bothering her terribly, instead of saying she was psychotic, she'd say she had a psycus.
The word "cholesterol" was pronounced "klosterol."
I was visiting with friends the other day and as usual I was using my mangled vocabulary. I didn't even think about other people not knowing I do this on porpoise. I wondered why they kept looking at me strangely. It didn't phase me though. I just offered them a hamburgular.