I'm still kicking

I haven't written in so long I'm not sure it I still "have it". It's been a trying time of late and my momma always said "if you don't have anything good to say, don't say anything at all". I guess I took her advice to heart. 

So what's been going on? Well, let's see...I guess the biggest thing has been the fact that my hubby decided to take a job in his hometown which happens to be over an hour from my house. This means that I only get to see him on the weekends. And let me tell ya, it kinda sucks. On one hand it's been a relief because when he was working for the law, he was a real bear to be around.

I mean, the man was impossible to live with. My manchild enjoys being in a bad mood but he was way worse than normal! Every...single...day the man walked in the front door after work in a BAD mood.No smile, barely a "hello" and you could see the hate pouring off of him in waves. I understand that being in law enforcement can make a person become jaded but it can also suck the life right out of people that have to be around someone like that. After 7 years he had finally had enough. I'm not sure if it was my threats of impending divorce or if he just finally had enough but praise be to the gods, he decided to find another career.

For about 2 weeks my man was pretty pleasant to be around. He was so dang relieved to be out of law enforcement he was giddy. It's taken about a month for him to de-stress and decompress but at this point I think he's going to make it. He got a job in a totally unrelated field which is good but he still finds things to be unhappy about. Since he already has a house in his home town and his new job is in his home town it only makes sense that he live there. It's good for his mileage but it isn't so good for maintaining his marriage. I feel like a single woman again. I only get to see him on the weekend and if something is going on here in the wicked city, I don't go down there. There have been weeks where I didn't see him for 2 weeks straight. He doesn't seem to mind which perplexes me. How could he NOT want to be around me 24/7??? I'm practically perfect in every single way!!!

I'm not sure what is going to happen. For the time being, I'm learning to be a single person again. If something breaks, I take care of getting it fixed - alone. If I want to go do something around town, I go alone. Or with girlfriends. I'm planning a little out of town trip with my kidlets but no hubby because what we're doing isn't his thing. You see? I'm virtually single! I've had lots of married people tell me that my situation sounds pretty ideal to them but they aren't in my shoes. They have live-in hubbies. They'd understand what they were missing pretty quickly if they were in my situation.

Well, I've gone and done it...Mama's advice about being quiet when there's nothing good to say just flew right out the window. Sorry about that. You see why I haven't written? Maybe I should go back into hibernation again!

It was NOT a most excellent day!

picture via Google via wallpaperswala.com

Ah, the lowly egg. Who would think that it could be a dangerous explosive device? Take my word for it - the egg can explode with amazing power given the right conditions. I found this out the hard way. It all started out when I decided to hard boil some eggs at home to take to work for a snack. I didn't have a lot of' time so I didn't boil them for very long but I figured they'd be OK. Once I got to work I was hungry so I cracked open one of the eggs only to have some of the white part dribble out in to my hands. wah wah wah..........  My stomach was growling so I decided to try microwaving the part of the egg that didn't dribble out for 30 seconds. 30 seconds people! That's barely long enough to heat a piece of bread! But about 20 seconds in, I started hearing popping and splattering and a few kabooms. I immediately turned the microwave off and peered inside to survey the mess when the dang yellow blew up in my face and all over me. I never knew something could blow up even when the magical microwaves weren't waving around but boy did it ever.

picture via Google via meaningfulmama.com

Not only was the interior of the microwave totally coated in exploded egg, I was covered. I had egg on my clothes, my face, it was in my hair...it was everywhere. And I was still hungry with nothing to eat.

Shortly after I finished cleaning myself and the microwave I received a message from my boss, asking me to set up a laptop and projector in a nearby conference room and I was instructed to make sure that the computer was logged onto the internet. Easy peasy, no problem. I grabbed the laptop and hightailed it to the conference room. I connected it to the projector and started logging onto the internet and that's when the troubles began. I couldn't get a wifi signal even though we have it in our building and the laptop is equipped to receive it. There had to be some setting that I didn't know about which is a real problem when you're not a technical type of person. I called the help desk and finally got through the steps to get logged on. One problem down then another problem arose! I had the computer hooked up to the cable that makes the screen appear through the projector and nothing was showing up. I looked through the display settings and couldn't seem to figure out why nothing was showing up. 3 minutes to go and I'm calling the help desk again. It's a miracle that I didn't get electrocuted because let me tell ya, I was sweating bullets. I finally got everything to show up through the projector just as people were filing into the conference room. Whew! I asked one of the people attending the meeting if they were waiting for my boss and I was informed that the meeting that was scheduled for that room was for accounting. ACCOUNTING?!?!? That's not what my boss's meeting was covering! A slow burn started in the pit of my stomach and worked it's way up my throat as it slowly dawned on me that I was in the wrong conference room. I cussed under my breath which probably came out waaaayyyy louder than I had expected and grabbed everything and ran like a bat outta hell to the correct conference room. As I entered the correct room I noticed that a person in the room already had a laptop which was projecting onto the big screen which was displaying...wait for it...the internet. After I had recovered from my heart attack I saw my boss strolling through the door so I asked him if he wanted the laptop I brought for something in addition to the laptop that was already up and running. I was told that he simply wanted to make sure there was a laptop ready and available.

Shoot me. Please.

I made it through an hour or so before the next forehead slapper happened. A coworker called and asked me for some images, so I created a folder on my desktop to put all of the images in and fired it off in an email to her. Shortly afterwords she called me and explained that she was having trouble opening the files. I tried to talk her through the process to open them and she wasn't having any luck so I went to the file I had on my desktop to see what was up. Guess what? I didn't put the images in the file! I sent her an empty file! DOH!!!!

The final disaster of the day happened when I ventured downstairs for lunch. I picked out what I wanted, paid and made my way to the elevator. As soon as I stepped in, the styrofoam container wobbled and my lunch fell face down onto the floor. Oh...my...gosh1 What else could go wrong? Luckily, nothing. I made it home without crashing, I didn't burn dinner and I finally got to bed without anything else going wrong. I was really glad that day was over.