If you're eating then you have to poo, can you return to eating afterwords?



Look,my fabulous illustration makes me look like the hunchback of Porcelonia!


I'm sure all of you have had it happen to you at least once in your lifetime. There you are...sitting at the table enjoying your meal when suddenly your gut clenches and you know you will be unable to put off going to the bathroom before you finish your meal. What do you do? Do you do you doodie (get it? I made a funny!) then resume eating? In theory It seems sort of gross.

I know what goes in must go out but I personally don't want to see the natural process in action while I'm trying to enjoy my risotto and fish. That's just wrong in my book.

When my kidlets were itty bitty and I was working and going to school all at the same time and was super duper busy, I will admit to cramming breakfast down my gullet once while sitting on the porcelain throne, but that was a one-time deal. It grossed me out too much. I decided that I'd rather eat and drive and possibly crash rather than eat and poo all at the same time. I know horses and cows can do it but not moi.

So I have to admit...I was eating lunch and my gut did clench and get the best of me. I had to close my lunch and run for the restroom. And what did I do when I finished? I put what was left of lunch in the refrigerator and went back to work. I couldn't resume eating. Aren't you glad I shared that with you? Now, I want to know if this has happened to any of you. Come on. Tell the truth. 'Fess up.

Chitty chitty - CRAP they're CHIGGERS!

Dad gummit! It's already chigger season again at our little house in the woods. I've got bites in places I don't want to mention and I didn't even go traipsing around in the woods! All I did is walk the perimeter and strolled in the yard taking pictures.

Those little creeps managed to embed themselves everywhere the straps of my "over the shoulder boulder holders" were and now I walk around wiggling like I've got..............chiggers. Luckily they stayed away from my lady bits for the most part. Although, I do have a few near my hiney so I'm sure I look like I've got a horrible wedgie because I'm always tugging back there to try and scratch that dang itch.

Let me just say for the record that I absolutely hate chiggers. I hate chiggers worse than mosquitos and I hate them pretty damn bad. I hate chiggers so much, if I were to meet one walking down the alley, I'd attack it and beat it up and leave it bleeding and gasping for air. And I'd probably pour salt on it's wounds. And laugh. Then spit on it. And call it a mean old sissy baby. Buy I wouldn't kill it because I'd want it to suffer just like I'm suffering right now.

I freakin' HATE chiggers! Dammit!